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Beer Warnings
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think
you are whispering when you are not.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor
in dancing like an jerk.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell
the same boring story over and over again until your
friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay
shings like thish.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe
that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone
them at 4 in the morning.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering
what the hell happened to your pants.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think
you have mystical Kung Fu powers.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll
over in the morning and see something really scary
(whose species and or name you can't remember).
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause
of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion
that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some
really, really big guy named FRANZ.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe
you are invisible.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think
people are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx
in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes
large) gaps of time may seem toliterally disappear.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE
pregnancy.
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